so a few days ago, i drove to memphis to pick up two ceiling fans for our new back patio. it was just me and the two little people for the drive. while i was there, i decided to make a target run because how can you pass up a chance to go to target when you are actually in a town that has one??? well, i had to go to the bathroom, so i chose the handicap stall for the extra room since i had to take two others in there with me (and most of the others were occupied anyway). i had to hold wes because i didn't want to put him down on that nasty floor, and he was barefooted. now keep in mind that william has rarely seen me go to the bathroom. if he goes in the bathroom with somebody, it's always with chase.
william: "mama!! you don't have a pee pee?!?"
(like this is the first time that anyone has brought that to my attention)
me: "no william, be quiet!!"
william: "but mama, you don't have a pee pee!!!"
me: "william, shhhhhhh! i will buy you whatever you want if you will just be quiet!"
(well, he's clearly fascinated at this point)
william: "you tee tee outta your booty??"
(i'm hearing chuckles from the adjacent stalls)
me: "william, just hush, and we'll go get some chicken nuggets."
(i'm wishing that wes will start screaming to drown out the anatomically inquisitive 2 year old standing beside me.)
william: "hey, mama! you need to get dirty???"
(all out laughter from my neighbors in the target restroom now)
me: "no william. i'm fine."
william: "are you suuuuuuuuure you don't need to get dirty?"
at this point, i'm trying as fast as i can to zip and button my shorts with one hand while holding wes with the other. who by the way, was being amazingly quiet. why couldn't he be in one of his babbling or screaming moods??? luckily, i was able to get out of there with only seeing one person face to face! but in the future, i will avoid liquids for 48hrs before i go on road trips that involve just me and little people. or maybe i'll just avoid them altogether!!!