Thursday, January 31, 2013

things they say

reed is my grocery shopping partner most of the time.  he knows where everything is, and he has opinions about what we should get and what we shouldn't.  a few mornings ago we were in the dairy department picking up some eggs.  he likes to open them and "push" on them to make sure they are ok. i picked up a dozen and opened it to find about 6 busted eggs.

reed:  "oh no!  some of those are crappin'!" (cracking?)

so i picked up about five different cartons and all had cracked eggs in them.  

reed:  "they all have eggs that are crap-ted." (cracked?)
me:  "yeah.  we should tell somebody that works here that they have an egg problem, shouldn't we?"

wrong thing to say.  i was just talking.  he took it literally.  so as we passed a skinny, young guy on the way out with a blue kroger shirt on....

reed:  "hey.  y-y-you got some crappin' eggs!!"

i bet that's the first time in his life that he's ever had somebody tell him that!


in the middle of a wrestling match in the den, i overhear from the kitchen:

william:  "get your phalanges off of me, wes!"
wes:  "you get your phalanges off!"
william:  "do you even know what phalanges are?"
wes:  "no.  but i don't want them on me!"


now imagine the following said in a 5 year old, southern drawl.  (sin = seeyun)

dear god,
we all just sin and sin and sin.  and if you didn't send somebody to take it away from us, we would all just go to hell. sent us jesus.  so.....thanks.

this was wes' prayer a few nights ago.  i've never heard the word "hell" come out of a 5 year old before.  but, he used it correctly, and it makes my heart happy that he at least somewhat understands the concept.  now i've just got to work on the 3 year old saying "crap" to the kroger boy!

1 comment:

Heather Wood said...

This really is the funniest. Arthur is wondering why I laughed out loud at the computer screen about 4 times in the last five minutes.
It's the same strange stare I get while cackling at our Monday night Bachelor convos. Seriously. . . You've got to get Chase in on the sarcasm. I'm dying to hear his comments. I really think the two of you together could outdo the green bean girl.